Concise storytelling. Striking visuals. Hapless, overfed man-children in comical situations. These are the things I love about television â?? or rather, used to love about television, before it turned into a cheapo cesspool of â??realityâ? freakshows. Nowadays, the real artistry comes in thirty-second chunks. Turns out that soda companies, breweries, car-insurance firms, and fast-food chains are the only entities left with enough money to make anything worth watching.

And Iâ??ll be watching, believe me, with this TiVo Series 3 HD THX Certified DVR. How satisfying it is to fast-forward past Bret Michaels and Simon Cowell to get to the latest humorous vignette about that scamp Jack in the Box. This TiVoâ??s 250GB hard drive can store approximately a hella-ton of commercials for savoring over and over. Iâ??ve practically worn out the pause button examining the mise-en-scene of that Dr. Pepper commercial with the midget KISS impersonators. Eat your heart out, Fellini.

Even better, this TiVo Series 3 HD DVR doubles as a YouTube player (with a home network with Internet access). Have you ever seen how many commercials are on that site? I could literally watch them until the sun expands and engulfs the Earth in flames, without ever repeating one. It also streams Netflix, Blockbuster, and Amazon video, but until they offer more commercials, Iâ??m not interested.

First, though, I had to have 2 CableCARDs installed so my TiVo Series 3 DVR could handle digital and HD cable. Youâ??ll want to check with your cable provider first, because many of them require that the cards be installed by their technicians. If youâ??re lucky, while youâ??re on hold, youâ??ll get to listen to commercials for the cable company. I love radio commercials even more than TV commercials because they have to be twice as aggravating to make up for the lack of video.

I really only have one complaint: TiVo, can you exert your influence to require broadcasters to devote more time to commercials? Even on the most ad-heavy cable channels (I love you, TV Land), thereâ??s still 40 or more minutes of programming every hour. This shocking imbalance means important voices are not being heard. Somewhere out there, some scrappy young filmmaker is coming up with the next â??smunchyâ? or â??wazzzupâ?, and I want to see it. Over and over and over.

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